I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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