i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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