We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize