I think I just saw someone hide a body.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
You would ignore him even if it wasn't NoManUary. It could be the Winter of a Thousand Dicks and you wouldn't talk to that guy.
The Winter of A Thousand Dicks sounds terrifying!!!
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Randomize
