What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Two words: nipple clamps
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