Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
