I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
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