I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
