Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
Randomize
