I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
They're putting plan B in vending machines now. My life just got so much easier.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize