The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
he had hair everywhere except his balls
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize