At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Randomize
