Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
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