Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Randomize
