Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I threw a hotdog at the security guard and called the bartender "goodlooking for a 35 year old who was rode hard and put away wet"... I would have kicked me out too
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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