Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Just reduced mom to tears when she realized I wasn't kidding about hating kids. She's crying about never being a gma. Now would be the time to tell her about the girl you knocked up. You're welcome.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
