is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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