Define "chronic" masturbator.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
St Patricks day needs to be raged like youve never raged before. Like youre in the desert and it starts raining beer. Like it's the day the announced the 21st amendment (which is the one that ended prohibition)
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
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