How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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