Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
