Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
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