The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
