Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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