We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I woke up this morning and thought "Im sure I've seen this house in a porno" and instantly googlemapped myself
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
I just want to make out with him forever
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
