make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
