What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize
