She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
found the other keg... it's in the tree
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Randomize
