So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
