This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
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