Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
This was my thought process as I drunkenly ran home: Whoa! I'm going so FAST! Why don't I run EVERYWHERE! ALL THE TIME! Then I peed in a bush and passed out on the ground.
So basically you were a dog.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
what the fuck happened to the tacos
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
Randomize
