if i died would you start the facebook group?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize
