If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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