margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
That feels better than graduating college or that time I tried to ride a llama. Did you know they really spit?
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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