let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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