Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
The police scanner is talking about you again....
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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