What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
