Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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