Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
Randomize
