good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Randomize
