how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
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