sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
