do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I didn't shave. On purpose
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
You can't just leave with hair like that
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Randomize
