Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
You kept trying to make cocktails with my protein powder last night...
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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