So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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