if you like me you must not know who I am
my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
