oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
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