Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
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