I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
