In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
