There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
I think that last shot was nyquil. Please come gte me. WINGS.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
Randomize
