she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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