Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Randomize
